how to be authentic when you're playing life's role

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Have you ever considered the idea that living authentically might mean embracing the roles life throws at you with enthusiasm rather than resisting them? In our latest conversation, we're grappling with the paradox of authenticity and personal branding, drawing inspiration from existential philosophy.

In this short episode, I explore the tension between being true to oneself and the necessity of adopting various personas, or calling forth personal attributes, in different life contexts. Reflecting on a thought-provoking gender and workplace course, we examine the seemingly opposing concepts of authenticity and cultivating a personal brand. Is it possible to align your personal brand with your true essence without falling into the trap of inauthenticity?
 
What if you could be a fantastic actor, owning every character you play while staying true to yourself? While bringing your unique essence into these roles, transforming potential impostor syndrome into a performance that aligns with your natural self?

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Transcript

Kemi Marie: 0:00

By default of being in this world, you are an actor. Everyone talks about being authentic, which is right up my alley. One of my favorite philosophers discusses being and authenticity in a book that's like hundreds of pages long, like 600, 700 pages long. In existential philosophy, authenticity is wealth-baited. But one thing that he mentions is that essentially, we all exist in many different personas characters, if you will, all of the time. That was my undergrad experience, but recently, like in my gender, in the workplace course, we learned a bit about cultivating your personal brand and honestly, it felt like it was just in the exact opposition to what I'd learned in undergrad. I went from a philosophy degree to a marketing one and the idea of having a personal brand in the workplace is something that my favorite philosopher would say is inauthentic. Right, he'd say like this is bad faith. Essentially, one of his arguments, one of his examples, I would say, is a waiter who acts overly like a waiter, with just exaggerated gestures, exaggerated mannerisms, and he says that in playing this role of the waiter, one is denying their own freedom and consciousness by completely identifying with their role right, rather than acknowledging their own agency as a person beyond the job title. It's this idea that you're playing a role instead of being yourself, but constantly and with the world that we live in. That's essentially what we're doing. So, to be authentic, you don't really hide behind a role, right. You don't really hide behind social expectations, you just are. And when you can simply show up, conscious about presenting yourself as you, some would consider that to be authentic. But it's really interesting to me because living this life requires bad faith. Right, it requires being a bad actor, but I say that maybe we don't have to be bad actors, right, maybe you could just be a fantastic actor.

Kemi Marie: 2:04

I think that, like right now, people are in this space of trying to align closer with just spaces that feel authentic period. Right, like, a lot of people don't want these roles. I understand that because I mean, that's my whole thing, like I've just kind of lived my life as me and I just whatever, just authentically showing up. But it's really up to you, right, there will be spaces where you are inauthentic, there will be spaces where you feel like an imposter. So I say that if you're in those spaces and you know that you have to show up, just choose a really good character to play, ace, your role. Imagine you're the star of the movie and promise that you'll do it.

Kemi Marie: 2:46

Well, I think that once you realize that you're playing a role in so many spaces, you can better act the part, that's really all it is. And I think if you see everything as a part, then you can have fun with it. Right, that's all it really is. You're an actor in that space, with it, right, like that's all it really is. You're an actor in that space, and so own it like bring your essence to the character, make it fun, bro, be the girly pop waiter Like. That's actually something that has really shifted my perspective in terms of authenticity, right, because when you're so focused on just being authentic and wanting to show up as yourself in literally every space, then it can feel like every space is not for you. It can feel like you have nowhere to exist, because this authenticity movement is honestly quite new, right. So something that's really helped me. I think, ultimately, as we, of course, aim for more authenticity, we're also going to be in spaces that maybe don't feel the best for us, and that's because we feel like imposters. But I think it's better if you can just. Maybe you're just playing a role, maybe you're just acting in a movie. Maybe we need to see life like that.

Kemi Marie: 3:53

So it really changed my perspective, just because I really had to dig deep into what I wanted my personal brand to be in the workplace. And my professor said something quite interesting. They responded to it because I chose educated, empowered, energetic and empathic. And their response to me was what's beautiful about your strategic response, in my opinion, is that you seem to understand that you do not need to change or mask your natural self. In many ways, you're preparing to be more open and available, which is not only courageous but savvy.

Kemi Marie: 4:26

How I interpreted that is that, yeah, I might have a personal brand in the workplace, but it's about essentially the pieces of me that I'm drawing out in that space. Right, it's not 100% inauthentic. It's actually me showing up with these specific attributes and ideas of myself and just putting them. I'm opening up those specific areas of me. If we're multifaceted beings, who are very diverse, there are just different pieces and parts of you that you're putting in different spaces, and when you show up in a specific space, that is the role that you're taking on Act like it, own it, have fun with it, put your spin on it. So I mean, it's just so interesting to me.

Kemi Marie: 5:06

There really is a strong push for authenticity, but I think that there's such great wisdom that comes when you realize that you're either going to be authentic or you're going to be playing a role. And if you're going to be playing a role, you better do it to the best of your freaking ability, because why not have fun? You know, we're literally in a movie, like we need to bring back alter egos. You need to have like 5 million of them, things. Bring that back. That's so fun, I love it. I love it. Anyway, thanks for listening. I'm your host, kami Marie. No-transcript.